2012: A Reflection

2012 has been quite the year for me. My life has changed so much since the start of 2012 that it’s hard to believe it’s only been a year since the start of it. It’s been the best year of my life so far.

2012 started off pretty badly. I was at the tail end of a bad five year relationship and was pretty depressed. I was obese and  unhappy with myself. Said relationship ended and I moved back in with my parents. I needed a change for myself.

At the end of January, my lifestyle change began. I decided I would no longer be unhealthy and unhappy with who I had become. I decided to take back control of my life so I started exercising and eating better. MyFitnessPal played a huge role in all of this. I invite you all to read the full story on my post entitled “On Doing Hard Things – My Story (So Far).” This post gives all the details and chronicles my weight loss and healthy life journey so far. Suffice it to say, I have now lost a total of 93.5 pounds in 2012. I am shooting for 100 pounds lost by my one year anniversary at the end of January 2013.

2012 and MyFitnessPal not only led me to losing the weight and gaining my life back, it led me to Jerry. More about this on the said blog post above. Our love story is a bit of a whirlwind, but it’s OUR love story… completely and uniquely ours. In fact, one of my friends called it a modern fairytale. I’d have to agree. Jerry and I became friends on MFP. We fell in love pretty quickly, and while most people have a hard time grasping the concept of loving someone you’ve only met online, I don’t care. I’ve met some wonderful friends online, and happenstance led me to meeting my soulmate online, too. It was hard, it seemed impossible at times… him being in Cali, and me being in NY, but when he finally came for a visit in June, after months of Skyping, we knew he couldn’t go back to Cali. We knew we didn’t want to spend a single day apart again. So he stayed. In August, he proposed, on the pier at the beach, a place we enjoyed walking, talking, and eating ice cream at all summer. It was the happiest night of my life.

Our love.

2012 also led me to becoming a runner. While this may not seem significant or life changing, it is for me. I never even dreamed I would be a runner. I always hated physical activity. I didn’t think I’d want to, but mostly, I didn’t think I COULD. I started slowly and with a lot of pain, but I kept at it. Now, I’m training for my first half-marathon in 2013. Running means a lot to me, mostly because it’s taught me to believe in my dreams, to believe in myself. Above all else, it’s taught me that I can do anything I dream of.

I’ve had so many wonderful moments in 2012, the moments we live for and look back on. These are some of the moments I will never forget:

• Picking Jerry up from the airport and finally seeing him for the first time. All day, I felt so anxious, and finally hugging him was the best feeling.
• Jerry proposing in August.
• Watching my brother get married to Sheena, my sister way before it became official in June.
• Crossing the finish line of my first race on Thanksgiving day, with Jerry and Scott, my trainer. Running along and struggling, but pushing through with them by my side.
• Hitting the 10 pound weight loss mark and flipping out for being in double digits. Hitting the 75 pound mark and being halfway to my goal. Realizing this change was real and permanent. Getting my first tattoo for reaching the 75 pounds. Jerry, Nick, and Sheena came to watch.
• Picking and carving pumpkins for Halloween with Jerry, Nick (my brother), and Sheena.
• Having the annual Christmas bakeathon with two of my little cousins (Matti and Sami), Sheena, and Mom. They won’t be little forever, and I’m trying to cherish these little moments we have together.
  

  Brother and I at his wedding in June, my tattoo, Bakeathon with cousins and Sheena in December

2012 has been a year of change. If I had to choose just one word to describe this year, that would be it. CHANGE. While it has been the best year of my life so far, I know 2013 will be even better. I know it will become the best year of my life.

In 2013, I will:

• Marry the love of my life
• Graduate with my Master’s degree in May
• Reach my weight loss goal (130-150 pounds lost)
• Run my first half-marathon
• Buy a home
• Become an aunt in July!

Indeed, 2013 will be another year of change, but so many wonderful changes await me. This year, I am a total girl in progress. Soon to be wife, soon to be librarian, soon to be graduate, soon to be runner… I’m a lot of soon-to-bes. But in 2013, those soon-to-bes, will no longer be soon-to-be… they’ll just BE. I can’t wait to reflect again this time next year, and to see who I’ve become in 2013.

Left: me at my heaviest, in 2011, Right: running, which changed my life, and spending Christmas with my love.