I had an interesting encounter yesterday. It was one of the first that really made me realize how differently I am probably viewed now that I am no longer morbidly obese. If you haven’t been around the blog long, then you might not know that I’ve lost over 100 pounds naturally through working my butt off, both physically and mentally. It hit me yesterday, through a very nasty statement by a patron at work, that people really do still judge fat people in the harshest of lights. Let me explain.
So yesterday I had a woman come up. She needed some assistance and got to talking about movies. She said “I just saw Tammy.” I began to reply that I thought it was funny when she interrupted me loudly with this statement: “I’m sorry but she [Melissa McCarthy] is just disgusting. She repulses me and I don’t even want to LOOK at her.”
So clearly this lady is repulsed by overweight people. If, last night, I had still been the nearly 300 pound girl that I was 2.5 years ago, I can’t even imagine the thoughts that would have been running through this woman’s head as I helped her. She would have been saying to herself, “this girl is disgusting. She repulses me.” Perhaps she would have even gone to someone else since my fat body would have repulsed her so much, despite the fact that I was helping her.
I can guarantee this lady just looked at me, a fairly average sized girl with a little chub, and figured that I would commiserate with her. She assumed that I, too, would bemoan the “disgusting, repulsive,” highly talented, incredibly successful, and really rather beautiful Melissa McCarthy. She had no idea that I have my own fat story. She assumed that because, like her, I wasn’t fat, that I would agree with her that fat people are worthless and cannot even be looked at because they are just soooo disgusting. Sorry lady, I’m not a complete and utter jerk.
I don’t really know what I’m getting at except that I was a bit enraged. For one, you can never know someone’s story just by looking at them. This lady had no idea the struggles that I endured to no longer be fat. And why? Because there are people in this world who look down so much on “fat people,” that we are trained to believe we are not good enough if we are fat. Newsflash: you are. I was still the same girl I always was, even when I was fat. In fact, I believe that I am who I am BECAUSE I was fat. I fell back on a lot of other things since I didn’t have the looks. I developed a unique sense of humor so that I could AT LEAST be the funny friend if I couldn’t be the pretty one. I also found books. My fatness made me incredibly shy. My shyness led me to books. My life? It kind of revolves around books and I wouldn’t have it any other way. And you know what else? I met my husband based on the fact that we were both fat. Yes, we met on a weight loss website. How’s that for fate and destiny? If I had never been fat, I would never have been on MyFitnessPal. If I had never been on MFP, I never would have met Jerry, and I don’t even want to imagine what my life would be like now if that had never happened.
I guess the other thing this really got me thinking about is that we really just ought to be nicer. I could brush up a bit on this lesson myself, truth be told. It is not okay to judge people based on their looks. Our worth is based on so much more than our appearances. Perhaps I have a unique perspective in all of this because I’ve seen and been on both sides of the coin: I’ve been the morbidly obese person, but I’ve also been the average size person that apparently people moan and complain about obese people to. Well I DON’T want to hear it.
So to this lady, judger of fat people, your conversation with this formerly fat girl was a complete and utter flop. I do not agree with you, not even in the slightest. You may think Melissa McCarthy and all the other fat girls of the world are disgusting, but I disagree: Melissa McCarthy, and even the old fat me, are a heck of a lot prettier than you. You are ugly on the inside, and that’s what truly counts.