I don’t really have casual interests or hobbies… they’re always more like obsessions for me. A one track mind, if you will. I’m an obsessive person by nature, filled with anxiety and obsessions over “what if’s” and “could be’s.” Those obsessions in my mind tend to carry over to my hobbies and interests, too.
There are those things that I’ve always loved: reading, writing, books, Halloween. These are interests and passions of mine that have always been there and have never left me.
Buuuut, then there are things that I become briefly obsessed with that have proven to be short lived interests: decorating and buying stickers for my planner, buying Lularoe, running, home decor, Dave Ramsey and debt snowballing, and so on. The latest object of my affection is vendor wax for my wax warmers (homemade wax in so many scents and from so many people!).
Typically, these interests of mine occupy my mind, brain, and sometimes money for a period of time, then fizzle out. I don’t generally just like these things either… I LOVE them. I go all in with these hobbies, joining groups, doing research, reading books, and spreading the word. I spend all or most of my free time on whatever new hobby I have, then it fades away into nothingness eventually. It makes it hard for me to focus on anything else, too, while I’m fixated on one particular thing. Sometimes hobbies circle back around, like with my home decorating which tends to ebb and flow. For months, I’ll go to co-ops looking for new primitive decor every free weekend, then I’ll stop for months, and then I’ll start it up again. Some hobbies are just dead and gone though, like stickers and Lularoe.
When I lost weight and took up running, it was the center of my world for a couple of years. I spent all of my free time and focus on counting calories, going for training runs, and working out. Then I had Caleb and my interest died out because I was too tired or too busy to care.
A couple of years ago, I started focusing on debt pay off and following the Dave Ramsey methods. I became obsessed. I was reading financial books night after night and talking everyone’s ear off who would listen about how to pay off debt. Constantly, I thought about money management, financial freedom, and what it would mean for me and my family. While this is a great thing to think about, eventually I found a new interest and that one fizzled out, too. As you can see lately with my Debt Diaries series, I’m getting back into that one now (which is for the best, really).
It goes like this with many things for me.
For a few months, I might be insanely focused on my blog and crank out post after post, scheduling things weeks in advance, and staying really up to date with reading and commenting on friend’s blogs. I promote my blog heavily and stay super involved in the blogging community. This ebbs and flows too, though. While blogging has always been a constant in my life, sometimes I get more obsessed with it than other times. I might go crazy intense with it for a few months, then I’ll back off for a few months and only update once or twice a week. It comes and goes in waves.
I spent all my free money on planner stickers for a few weeks, then I got over it and stopped altogether. Then I started spending all my money on Lularoe and it became my whole wardrobe. Then I got bored with that, too. These weren’t just casual interests either. I would spend hours each week looking up stickers and then new Lularoe designs that I HAD to have. That’s just the way my brain seems to be wired… go all in when I like something to a point where it borders on obsession, then get burnt out by it because it’s been my sole focus for awhile. Eek.
I guess what my point is that at the moment, I am striving to find balance in my life. I am trying to be “all in” on a few things, and it’s hard since I’m used to that one track kinda mind. Right now, I feel a bit all over the place. I’m trying to focus on debt repayment, and weight loss, and counting calories, and keeping up with the blog, and so on. Instead of being intensely laser focused on just one thing though, I need to simply do my best with each of these things. I need to tell myself that it’s okay to back off a bit and just do your best and that you don’t need to pounce on each and every thing with an obsessive quality. You don’t need to give all your energy to any one thing; you can (and SHOULD) divide it up amongst a few things that are important to you. More importantly, you don’t have to do something obsessively to do it at all. I don’t HAVE to train for a marathon to run. I don’t HAVE to work out seven days a week or not at all. Not everything has to be all in, all the time. I can make time for something, even if I can’t make ALL of my time for it. So what if I’m not eating perfectly every single day? That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t try on the other days. My mind likes to tell me that if I can’t give something 110%, that I just shouldn’t do it at all… but that’s some serious BS. I can give it my best and know that it’s good enough.
Right now, the bulk of my energy and time goes to my family and my career. Those are the two most important things that I need to focus on. After that comes everything else: reading, blogging, weight loss, debt repayment. What I’m discovering is that I CAN do all of it if I approach these things with a different and improved mindset. I don’t need to be so intensely obsessed with weight loss and calorie counting that I can’t focus on our finances and debt. And I don’t need to be so laser focused on our finances that I don’t make time to blog. Feel me?
One way I tie all of my interests together is via my blog. I am writing, which I love to do, while also talking about my other interests: finance, weight loss, books, and so on. If you see an uptick in any of these posts lately, that’s why. I’ll be continuing my Debt Diaries and Financial Friday posts, while also re-introducing weigh ins and fitness posts like I used to. I’m trying to stay grounded because all of these things are really important to me and I can’t let myself get so lost into any ONE interest that I totally lose focus on another. That’s where this blog and my goal posts come into play… helping hold me accountable in all of these areas of my life that I’m working on right now.
What’s the point of this post? I really don’t know! I guess I’m trying to work out how my head works and the way my mind functions when it comes to my interests. I guess I’m also trying to figure out a way to work on all of these things at the same time, without losing sight of any of them.
How about you? Can you relate at all or am I just crazy? HA!